A friend of mine has a Tumblr blog. Called ‘Conchita Could You Not‘, it’s the place where she puts all her ‘squee’ when it comes to fangirling the fabulous Conchita Wurst. Unfortunately for me, it’s also a place with pretty GIFs. A place where you can watch Conchita smiling, doing her ‘tongue flick thing‘, and raising that one stupendous eyebrow over and over again. I try not to go there, as I simply never leave.
But today, while doing a quick drive-by, I became fixated on one of her latest GIF sets. A set of looping videos of Conchita Wurst on a French TV show last week. Because this one? It’s magic.
And that’s because it suddenly dawned on me. Conchita Wurst? She does ‘girly’ better than most girls. Or, should I say — the 25 year old gay boy behind Conchita Wurst — he is the Master of Girl.
So, let me explain what I mean by that and, if you like, we can do it GIF by GIF, although one GIF might be a bit embarrassing so I might not go there — (who am I kidding? That’s the best one). (Go here first for all GIFs before we get started)
Now, look at the first GIF. It’s just Conchita arriving at the show, and taking her seat. Nothing special about that. But yep, there is. Sexy tongue flick, sensually moves her hair back from both sides of her face, a girly bounce on the chair to get comfortable and, right there……..I’m never leaving.
In the next GIF, it’s the feminine head tilt, the amazing smile that just makes you feel lit up inside, and that ‘surprised’ look she has down so perfectly. Yep. Smitten. (And to the lovely Ms. Wurst, if you’re reading this — that gorgeous smile should be on every photograph because faux Victoria — not so much).
The third GIF is nothing more than tongue flick because, let’s face it, it’s not just me that’s obsessed with that. Apparently there’s a whole fandom (although me? I’m the one who named it).
Then we move on to cute cute cute. Gorgeous smile, those flashing eyes, and that sweet ‘pffft’ she does. It’s all girl, all of the time, and it just makes me laugh.
On the fifth one (don’t ask about the other guy in the wig, the whole thing was weird), and she’s suddenly girly girl who just got a little bit teased. But, hey, she got a kiss and we got her stunning smile. Magic.
Number six? The smile, of course, followed by an almost shoulder shrug (we’ll get to that in a minute), and then this weird little pout, but where she tilts her chin up and moves her head to the side. Sweetest thing ever, and the last time I saw it? She was in the depths of Africa somewhere being more real girl than the rest of the girls combined.
Now this next one might be a tad embarrassing (and remember, Conchita, I’m not the one who put it there) but this? This is my favorite. Because it’s sweet and funny and so sexy, and you can just tell what’s going through her head.
And that’s because she got kissed, once on each cheek, by a cute older guy (and, yep, she likes them). But what we got as a result was fabulous – Conchita sweetly presenting her cheek for the kiss, followed by an eye flick upwards to follow the man as he left, glancing demurely back down, and then eyes flashing back up after him — finished off with the sexiest lip lick ever. Yep, she liked him and she certainly couldn’t hide it.
The last three I’ll mention together because they involve that amazing shoulder shrug she often does followed by her beaming smile — awesomely cute and girly and makes you just want to hug her — closed out by that incredible one eyebrow lift she does so well. Seriously? Who does that? Well, Conchita Wurst. Obviously.
And yes, I may be analyzing these GIFs in a closer or more personal way than you might, but what it all boils down to is this. Conchita Wurst is all girl. So much so, she does ‘girly’ better than I ever have or will. And me? I like that.
I'm a former radio DJ, an ex non-profit Director of Development, and a left-wing human rights advocate. I'm also an avid video game player. Minecraft is my obsession.
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